Rua | Wülf

Rua|Wülf is a migrating play currently taking place at The Goat Farm on the west side of Atlanta. I saw it last Friday and have been singing it's praises ever since. Historically, I have not been much a theatre-goer. This could be due to the fact that I have not been aware of many plays with subjects that peaked my interest but more so because I have not found myself able to get "lost" in plays the way I can in books or movies. I am naggingly aware that the actors are acting and am normally left craving more authenticity or at least a few more surprises.

Rua|Wülf is a dark, sexual and sometimes disturbing interpretation on the children's classic "Little Red Riding Hood". I've heard of many children's stories being re-interpreted to discover their sexual or violent undertones so I was not surprised to hear that this production's interpretation focused on Little Red Riding Hood's story as one about a girl becoming a young woman, discovering her sexuality and avoiding "wolves" on the pathway to love and self discovery... and I was intrigued.

There were so many things done right in this play. One- there was no actual wolf... just the mysterious and very human Hemmimg. A man who became a "wolf" only after being taken advantage of as a young boy (I will leave out all of the details as to not spoil the play). Almost subconsciously seeking revenge on the wrongs done to him in the past, Hemming preys on Rua ("Little Red") to not only satisfy his sexual hungers but to also satiate his innermost urges to reach the one he cannot have through Rua.

Two- this literary journey from Mother's house to Grandmother's house is also a literal one. You walk among the actors over the 12 acre Goat Farm as the sun sets and both the night and story grow colder. For about two and a half hours you interact with the same set as the actors from watching Hemming and Rua dance in the forest from behind the trees to sitting at the foot of Grandmother's bed. At one point I said it reminded me of being a little kid and going out on a night walk with friends. Everything normal somehow became a little scary and unfamiliar. Every step you took was a little shorter than the last as you nervously walked deeper into the darkness.

Three- the actors... all of them are fantastic. Every actor in this play was lost in their role allowing the audience to really see them as the characters they portrayed and caused the audience to react emotionally when finding out new information about the characters we thought we knew. Despite feeling every moment that I'd just found out an important secret that might provide the explanation I was searching for in the plot, I found that both the characters and the story evolved so quickly that there was almost no way to predict the outcome of this dreary tale.

The intermission was incredibly special. Staying true to the story's roots, we all sat down to an exquisitely decorated Alice and Wonderland-like tea party for tea and cookies. The break came after two separate and intense monologues where the audience was broken into two groups to hear background information from each of the each main characters. I couldn't wait to rejoin my group to unload all of the secrets Hemming told me in private... or at least, it felt that way.

I wish I could divulge more details of the play's powerful and intense story line, but then I would rob you of some of the play's most exciting moments. Please check out Rua | Wülf at the Goat Farm. Be entertained, support local artists and see one of the most important venues in the city of Atlanta in all it's glory. And watch out for the Turkey that lives on the grounds... he runs around loose and isn't afraid to speak his mind. BUY TICKETS NOW- only running through the 29th! http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/225913.

Things I learned while dating.

I will start off this post by saying that by no means do I know everything about dating but, what I can tell you is many of my single girlfriends have told me to write down and share my personal advice and I am now following through that that suggestion. After all, there are plenty of things I wish I could have told myself when I started dating as an adult. This may all sound a little corny but, here they are: the things I learned while dating:

1. Don't trust a guy who has no girlfriends. By that I mean, friends that are girls. And, very specifically, girls that are friends that have never dated them. A guy with close girl friends respects women, finds women to be funny and feels that women are worth having all sorts of relationships with, not just romantic ones. I think they will inherently respect and be more inclined to ask for women's opinions. I think a lot of girls see a guy hanging around other women and see it as a threat. It is not; It's a GOOD thing.

2. Opposites attract sounds nice and all but, it's a lot more fun to be with someone who likes to do the things you like to do. I think a sign of a good relationship is one where your partner feels like your best friend. You both deserve to be with someone who shares similar passions. Do not feign interest in sports if you hate sports... it will only come around to bite you in the ass later. Same for guys, don't say that you can "totally get down with a RomCom" if you don't really mean it. If you love being active, you will go NUTS with a total couch potato. And this point directs me to lesson #3...

3. You have no business dating until you have a good relationship with yourself. You need to know what you like, not necessarily in relationships- dating will teach you that, but what you like about your life. Make sure to devote time to your own personal development before trying to show someone else who you are. It definitely makes dating far more enjoyable when you are confident and know you have something to offer instead of trying to find someone to help you discover who you are... that rarely works and puts too much power in the hands of someone you are just getting to know.

4. Dating is not all about THEM, it's about you too. Go places you want to go and see. When they ask you where you would like to go- tell them somewhere you want to go! It sounds silly but so few women use this opportunity to enjoy the city they live in or try something they've always wanted to try. If you make the date itself more about the experience rather than putting so much pressure on the person being someone you can really be with, you will inevitably enjoy it more. That way, it's not all a loss if it doesn't go anywhere.

5. Going on "bad" dates will teach you more about yourself than anything else. How do you handle an awkward situation? Can you still find a way to enjoy yourself even if the person isn't a match? And, not to mention, my bad dates where the best stories to share with friends.

6. It is NOT normal to HATE every single one of your exes. I'm not saying they need to be best friends with them but, c'mon... How can someone HATE ALL of them? What does that say about that person? I know it may cause your ego to inflate temporarily when you hear "how much better you are than the last person" but, first off, they shouldn't be directly comparing you to anyone else and secondly, it just shows that, no matter how good things may start in their relationships, not only do they end but they end BADLY... run! Run for your life! I definitely trust a man who has "friendly" relationships with his exes and doesn't have a million mean things to say about someone once they've broken up. It's nice to know the guy I'm with chose good, sane, nice women as girlfriends and not crazies... although it's normal for them to have one of those and, hey, we all make mistakes!

7. Specifically do not go on dates some weeks and just do things you like and be around the people you love most. It's not your job to find someone as soon as possible. If your approach to dating is relaxed, you will learn more, have more fun and it will be SO much easier to recognize when you've found someone special because they will be the ones that REALLY make you nervous.

8. Ask someone out or let them know you like them... don't always let the guys be the ones choosing... that definitely worked out for me in finding my dream guy ;)

9. Wear exactly what you feel like wearing and do not try to look any particular way that is different from how you normally look. It will only make you feel more confident if things go well if you know they really appreciate you for the way you naturally are.

10. You don't have to date anyone if you don't want to. It's only important if it's something you want.

There you have it. I tried to make this sound like the advice I've dished out to my friends recently and hopefully not like a Cosmo article. My dating days are over but I've learned wonderful lessons and found a relationship that will last a lifetime... not too shabby :)

The Perfect Proposal

It's December 23rd, Christmas Eve Eve and everything seems normal... almost uneventful. Brett and I will be celebrating our first ever "Honeymas" meaning the Christmas just the two of us before our multiple family celebrations begin and things get crazy. We wake up, work out, I have lunch with my best friend Jacqueline and later on, Brett and I meet up for a short hike in the afternoon before going home to get dressed up and go out.

Brett and I met on Match.com and had our first date on January 15th this year at Iberian Pig in Downtown Decatur. That date was magical and ended up lasting over seven hours... the rest is history.

Brett and I decided a few months into our relationship that we would try to wait until our one year anniversary to go back to Iberian Pig to keep it sacred and special but once the Christmas season was upon us, we knew we had to go soon. The mahogany bar and pork cheek tacos were singing their siren song and we couldn't resist! So, we decided a couple of weeks ago we could have our private Christmas there and enjoy a beautiful dinner together and exchange our Christmas cards before going home to open gifts together.

Because we live together, sometimes Brett leaves early to come back and either pick me up or will meet me at our date location... maybe that's a little cheesy but we think it's fun to meet up for dates ;). So, Brett left about an hour early while I got ready and we both walked over to the restaurant separately. I'm not going to lie, I actually had suspected that "Honeymas" would be the night Brett would propose but slowly over the past week, he definitely convinced me there was no chance that it would happen that night. He kept referring to Christmas at his dad's as "real Christmas" and seemed to keep "forgetting" about our date. He also seemed randomly distant and a little distracted the couple days leading up to the proposal... I know now that this was part of his strategy. I not only stopped thinking he would propose that night but actually started to think he didn't even want to go to dinner at all!

When I arrived, we hugged and sat down for a gorgeous meal. We ordered wine, tapas and split an unbelievable steak (FYI... Iberian Pig is one of the best restaurants in ATL- you must go!). We laughed and chatted normally, I did however mention that his hands looked shaky but he told me he was starving so I didn't make much of it. Our waitress Lane was awesome and we were visited a few times by the owners and managers... I just wrote this off as awesome service. It wasn't until after we finished our meal that our server told us that dessert was ready outside... "Outside???" I thought. This might be my inner fat kid but I secretly hoped they had a s'mores station set up outside! haha! I grabbed my coat and we walked out to find the most shocking and incredible proposal set-up I've ever seen!

I froze and tried to take it all in. There were tons of rose petals and candles leading up to a table for two right in the middle of Decatur square and a guitarist singing and playing our song "Le Vie en Rose". I wouldn't have taken another step if it wasn't for Brett putting his arm around me and walking me to the top. I was bawling like a baby and had even pulled my jacket collar up over my face trying to muffle my sobs. People around the square all looked on to watch the proposal and Brett looked me in the eye, told me how much he loved me and how he wants to go on adventures with me for the rest of our lives and to make him the happiest man in the world by being his wife. He knelt down and presented the ring... the PERFECT ring... and I held him and said "yes" in ever possible way I could. The crowd applauded and I turned to notice that people in the restaurant were clinging to the windows and some of the waiters and waitresses had come outside to watch. I couldn't bring myself to sit down for more than a minute to toast champagne before popping back up and hugging and kissing Brett again.

We decided to go back inside to warm up and enjoy our champagne and call our families. The restaurant applauded as we came in and I continued to cry tears of joy and SHOCK. He confessed to me that he had been planning this for weeks and had to act distant in order to throw me off the trail and that he did! Before we left, the owner presented us with a menu signed by the entire staff that helped make the amazing proposal possible and we walked home hand in hand smiling from ear to ear.

I cannot wait to be with Brett for the rest of my life. We love adventure, simple pleasures, our families and friends and their sheer outpouring of love and support has been overwhelming. It makes us feel incredible to know how much everyone around us wanted this to happen and just reaffirms our choice to be together forever. Brett is honestly my best friend, favorite person to do travel with, the best person to laugh with and the best bike riding, hiking and dancer partner I've ever had. We are so in love and I honestly couldn't feel happier. I cannot wait for our amazing families and friends to come together to celebrate our wedding and to continue having fun, learning and exploring the world with the best person I know. And, not to mention, I think I hit the jackpot with my in-laws! Thank you for all the love and I look forward to seeing what the future holds for me and the man of my dreams :) Below is a picture of the beautiful set of the proposal ;)

And the best date night award goes to...

Push Start Kitchen!

Let me tell you, Brett won some major boyfriend points with this one! I never thought the best date I would ever go on would include dinner with eight strangers.

Push Start Kitchen is a small dinner club run out of an loft space in West Atlanta by a fabulous husband and wife duo. Their romance began in Costa Rica so every dish they serve has an exotic Latin twist. Their rented space is inside a 130 year old cotton gin manufacturing plant and is next to "The Goat Farm" art community(http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Goat-Farm-Atlanta/162337850449783).

The only way to attend a dinner is to join their mailing list and when they send out the menus for the week, be one of the first eight people to respond. Little did I know, Brett had been trying to get us on the list for months. Finally after a few months of persistence, Brett got us on the list and we couldn't wait to check it out. When we first arrived, we had no idea what to expect but when we walked in, we found eight fun, friendly, and like-minded Atlantans looking for something new and exciting to try in their city.

We all relaxed outside with awesome rum cocktails and appetizers while we waited for dinner to be prepared. When we walked into the dining area, I couldn't believe how quaint and beautiful it was. A long beechwood table with an open door facing a train track that, when it came by, sounded so fitting amidst the urban oasis we found ourselves in that night. Tiny bricks were missing in the walls and replaced by tea candles and awesome indie music played in the background.

Each course was made even more delicious with their wonderful wine pairings that bought every bite to life. A fresh beet salad with ham hock, avocado and goat cheese was followed by a delicious sous vide chicken breast with liver mouse and roasted pear. The dessert was chai ice cream with sweet potato and gingersnap. We finished the meal with shots of 100 year old rum that would knock most pirates to the ground. We stayed and chatted with our new friends for almost another hour and a half before we realized it was midnight. The "dinner with strangers" ended up becoming dinner with friends and we didn't want to leave!

Eating at meal at Push Start Kitchen is amazing but what this couple is really creating is an unforgettable experience for people all over the city to come together for a moment of real peace, friendship and culinary exploration. They suggest a $50 donation per person but let me tell you, the experience is priceless. Please visit http://pushstartkitchen.blogspot.com/ to set up an incredible evening for you and someone you love. It really is unforgettable.

Pushing my boundaries...

Today was my last day at GF. I have to say, while I got a lot out of my time there, I was more than pleased to pull out of that parking lot for the final time and start a new life. With a new, exciting career on the horizon, I wanted to treat myself to something relaxing to begin my 4 1/2 days off and decided to visit Je Ju, a Korean spa near Gwinnett Mall. I have been hearing about Je Ju for the past 3 years. People rave about this place. "The body scrubs are amazing!" "It's open 24 hours a day!" "You just walk around NUDE!"

... It was the last one I was worried about.

Now, I have to tell you. I am a corner-of-the-locker-room-changer. The girl that puts her bra on underneath her shirt. The girl who's butt is only exposed for the 0.65 seconds it takes her to rapidly pull up her gym shorts. Needless to say, nudity in public places is not my thing. And the fact that every woman kept saying, "it's just women!" made me feel even weirder... am I the only woman who feels the need to cover up even around other women? But, after a hilarious and convincing conversation with some fabulous Je Ju-loving girlfriends the night before, I decided I had to give it a try.

I was surprised about the things that were worrying me the most. Was the population mostly going to be very petite Asian women that would be shocked and/or appalled by my gigantic boobs and big butt? While I thought I could easily deal with soaking in the hot tubs and laying in the saunas nude, how was I supposed to just walk around from station to station with a towel only big enough to cover one butt cheek at most? And, my worst fear of all, with all of these water activities going on around me, what would I do is I just completely wiped out and slid across the floor in a naked mess!?

I pushed these fears aside and went anyways... with my own full-sized towel, of course ;). When I got there, I was given a tour of the "Wet Spa" with my clothes on (thank god- I was not ready to strip down) and then started to get naked... once I was without any clothes, one of the women working there came up to me, grabbed my hand and walked me over to the spa..... NAKED... I was totally out of my comfort zone! I quickly hopped into the hot tub and sighed a huge sigh of relief... After a few relaxing minutes, I started to stop feeling so self-conscience and really began to unwind. I signed up for a full body scrub which was without a doubt worth every strange moment that was about to ensue.

I climbed up onto a slippery, wet table and started getting scrubbed down by a older Korean woman wearing black, lacy underwear... I found that to be strange. I pictured them wearing matching black shorts and tank tops or something but, whatever... this isn't regular life, this is Je Ju. A few minutes in, you start to see your excess skin collecting on the table and start realizing the benefit. Well, my first strange moment happened on this table. I was laying face-up having this Korean lady scrub my boobs with hand scrubbers as two fully-dressed women came by taking a tour and look me dead in the eyes. What does one do but say, "...hi"... it was very weird. After every square inch of you has been scrubbed they grab a bucket and throw water on you... I felt a bit like Free Willy but I quickly recovered... they then rub you down with baby oil, give you a massage, and then pour milk all over your body.... it was amazing but I had to keep reminding myself not to worry about my completely naked body awkwardly sliding around the oil-covered table... hahaha.

I was surprised that after being there just an hour, I was walking around towel-free and without a care in the world. When I first arrived a talked with a few women in the hot tub and thought, "wow, these women really don't care about walking around naked! it's amazing!" and, by the end of my time there, anyone could have thought that about me as well! After a short cat nap in the dry sauna, I brushed my teeth and headed home. I conquered a major fear of mine and it felt amazing. I think, as a woman, I spend far too much time thinking about what I don't like about my body and not nearly enough time thinking about what I DO like... which is actually a lot and doing things like this for yourself reminds you of those things. But, with that being said, it will still be quite a while before I'm heading to Je Ju in groups of friends... I love my girls but I don't need them to know me like that! ;)

Love and Marriage

I'm sure you know this Sinatra song... and I find that it is constantly in my head as I enter the phase of life in which everyone... and I mean everyone is getting engaged or married. My refrigerator is slowly filling up with "Save the Date" magnets, Facebook is littered with engagement photo shoots and, one of the one of my favorite things about it: I am getting to wear so many of my cute dresses to wedding functions ;). But all of these nuptials beg the question... how the hell is everyone falling in love at the same time??

Now, before I get going, I need you to know, I LOVE love. I am one of the biggest advocates for love you will ever meet and love nothing more than everyone around me being in love but maybe it's just the cynic in me that needs to ask questions to really believe it all. I am BEYOND happy for my friends taking this amazing step but with so much of it going on at once, it makes me wonder what is going off in everyone's head around the age of 25 that screams, "Get married! Get married!"? Sometimes it seems like there are many people listening to their biological clocks rather than their hearts. I do not think there is a perfect age to get married but I do think there is a perfect time in a relationship. What is the rush, I wonder? Or maybe this is just my outsider perspective looking in...

If there is every any educated decision I want to make in my life, it's choosing the best possible guy for me... someone who will let me grow and not expect me to be exactly the person they married years down the line. I want to be much better later in life! I say this because I am always hearing people say, "He/She just isn't the same as they used to be" and I feel stifled just at the thought of having my personal growth stumped by being married... but I guess so many of my qualms with the state of marriage these days just highlights the fact that I have heard far too many complaints about it lately.

But, despite the divorce rates and the jokes about sexless marriages and nagging wives and distracted husbands, I still have high hopes for marriage... not just in my life but in other's as well. I have the most in-love parents you'll ever meet, a sister and brother-in-law that are kicking marriage's ass and some close friends who have never been happier. I guess it's all about choosing someone great and taking good care of them... I don't think there is some magic formula or process... just genuine love and mutual respect. At least... I think ;)

I wish I had been dreaming...

By now many of you know what happened the night before last but, for those who don't know or have not heard the details, here's the story...

On Tuesday night I came back from hanging out with Jason at his place and got ready for bed. I slipped into some PJ's, watched a couple of episodes of "The Office" and drifted into sleep with absolutely no idea of the nightmare to come. I have no idea what caused me to suddenly wake up on Tuesday but as soon as I opened my eyes, there was a man crouched down next to me with his hands delicately pulling down my comforter. There is nothing more terrifying than this... nothing.

I cannot tell you what possessed me to do this but, instead of covering myself or trying to move away from him, I thrashed out of bed screaming in a deep, psychotic voice and ran toward him as he backed away in shock. In my loudest, most insane voice I kept screaming "GET OUT! GET OUT! GET OUT! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" as he stumbled out my door and I chased him out of the front entrance of my apartment. I locked the door behind him, grabbed my phone and shut myself in my closet.

I called 911 and the moment someone answered, I started sobbing. I spent 12 minutes in my closet waiting for someone to come. TWELVE MINUTES! Anything could have happened but thank God it didn't. Because, somehow, both of my roommates slept through the experience, I spent those 12 minutes thinking the absolute worst... "Had he already been in their rooms?", "Where they alive?", "Where there other men in my apartment?"... I had no idea. When the police finally arrived, I struggled to put on a pair of pants and a coat with trembling hands. I pushed Josh into my bathroom and answered the door.

The police officer showed me where the fucker came in... he took the screen off our living room window and crawled in. He made a bee line straight to my room but, luckily, his plan failed. I have no idea whether or not things would have been different had I reacted any other way, but I think my reaction made the difference and probably saved me. Not to make this a PSA announcement but there are a few things I want to share from this experience:

1. I took self defense and truly believe it prepared somewhat me for this situation. I felt like I could stand up to this man even after being ripped out of sleep. I may not have had to lay a hand on him, but my sheer confindence in the confrontation probably made a difference.

2. LOCK YOUR DOORS AND WINDOWS... we have no memory of unlocking ours but, it will forever be a nightly ritual for us to check.

3. If you live with all women- do NOT live on ground level... it's too easy for creeps to sneak in.

4. Do everything you can to FIGHT BACK... if I had frozen, I probably would be too messed up to share this story with you today.

All I can say is I am so thankful that this situation was not any worse that it was. I'm also thankful for my amazing and supportive friends and family who provided shoulders to lean on after such a traumatic experience.

And... because I would consider myself a complete failure if I could not eventually see any humor in this situation... I will admit that, even while wiping tears away from my face while talking to the cop, I thought of this...